Thursday, February 16, 2012

Loved and Lost: The Library

I broke up with the library for good.  It's really sad.  Sometimes I remember the wonderful times we had together and I am tempted to call and try to get back together, but then I remember that I don't want to be that girl. A desperate woman who takes abuse and then keeps coming back for more.  I simply refuse to wear the sign that says "kick me, I'm pathetic". 


I owe the library $110.  Not because I ruined the books and have to pay for them, and not because I lost them and never took them back. Because I good and used the library.  I take all four of my children and we all check out books.  We could read things on the computer and download them to our iPad (which we also do), but I wanted them to experience the community, the catalog, the alphabetization by author, the thrill of choosing from hundreds of paper books with bindings that smell like learning and bringing home something hand picked and special.  I loved that stuff and I don't want my kids to be so digitalized that they don't know what it means to sit with a real book and read. So modern that they don't know what the library is. I check out real books for school too, we're a family and a school and there are so many resources right there at our fingertips.  It's amazing.  But when we leave the library we have a lot of books.  If they are late it turns out that it adds up to a lot of dollars.


Now you should know, I am a pretty typical citizen.  I pay my bills when they are due, I let drivers in when they need to change lanes,  I take the empty grocery cart to the cart return, I show up on time for dental appointments.  And I return my library books.  However,  I could never honestly tell you that I have done every one of these things flawlessly 100% of the time.   I have certainly cussed at another driver and sped up,  and I have occasionally left the cart piggy-backing the curb near my car. But for the most part these slip-ups, errors in judgement--these mistakes, result in a fitting consequence.  A guilty twinge in my conscience, or a small late fee. I've had to call the dentist and eat crow--maybe even pay a reasonable fine.  But the punishment for being a good citizen who has made a mistake usually fits the crime. 


The library, however, seems to be out for blood.  And they want you to feel like a second rate citizen.  "We have things in place to help you be more responsible if you'd like". Okay, that's enough infuriating woman with the patronizing smile.  The problem here is not that I am irresponsible and can't remember to be a grown up.  The problem, LADY, is that I have more stuff to keep track of in 12 minutes than you have in three weeks--put together!  I did my make-up while peeing and grading a spelling test this morning.  Did you? When I got in the car to come here, I had my purse, like you probably did. Only I also tracked down all of the socks and shoes in the universe, 5 coats, a bunch of instruments, dance gear for two people, a couple of blankies, snacks for in between errands and appointments, and a few guys and cars in backpacks to keep the boys entertained.  Oh and my patience.  I tried to bring that, but the more we talk the more it's looking like I may have left it in my room under the covers. Actually, I think it went to the gym and is currently imagining your face while working the punching bag.


I called about my fines.  I felt bad they were late, but $110? That just seems unreasonable. The punishment doesn't fit the crime.  It seemed to me that we have one of two problems.  They're either trying to get my money or they want to teach me lessons. If the library needs these fines to stay open, there seems to be a conflict of interest.  They would want us to return books late.  The later, the better.  I was assured, just as I suspected, that the library is a non-profit organization funded by tax dollars. So it must be about making sure the books come back. You know, collateral of sorts.  But in this case, why is there no flexibility once the books are returned? Why insist still that we cut deep into this weeks grocery budget?  Are't we for the children?  Are hungry children good readers? This, it turns out was the reason, but he attempted to comfort me in the knowledge that they would never charge more than the book is worth. They will still take it back, to be sure, and no doubt charge countless other irresponsible citizens for it's worth again and again. Yes, the fine is applied to assure that the book is returned, but as they don't need the funds, make no mistake, it sticks because of the lessons. I think they keep these ill-gotten gains in a jar and use them to throw parties for themselves celebrating how good they are at never forgetting anything. It just seems very librarian-y. Stereotypes come from somewhere, right? 


I just can't guarantee that I will never forget my library due date.  Just like I try really hard to remember the dentist, I make every effort to return books on time.  I also mostly remember to pick my kids up from stuff and to feed them, but everything slips through the cracks sometimes.  At this rate, I literally can't afford the risk of checking out books.  Just like any investment, the risk can't outweigh the reward.  


So it's sad, but in the end we had to go our separate ways.  Eventually, I stopped using Blockbuster Video for the same reason.  Oh, wait...EVERYONE stopped using Blockbuster Video for this reason.  I asked the manager of the Library what he thought of the fact that the community has so much more access to material now with the internet and digital media.  I asked him if he was worried that this type of rigid insistence on the letter of the law would, like Blockbuster, result in the eventual downfall of a beloved institution.  Less kids growing up fondly remembering this time-honored American family tradition. Do you know what he said?  He said, no. Because Blockbuster was a private company and unlike private business, the library is funded by tax dollars and can't fail.  Well watch out Mr. Smarty Pants.  The Postmaster General said the same thing.

10 comments:

  1. The library is funded by tax dollars and can't fail. That's rich. I stopped using the library for the same reason. I forgot to return several books and the fines add up! It was over $100, which is nuts.

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  2. It is rich...over on the west side the fines stand until you return the books and then they are very forgiving. I never had to pay fines for reasonable tardiness. It's out of control!

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  3. I probably would have done the same thing, except the Sno-Isle Library System DOES NOT HAVE FINES! This means that we often do not return books until they are "LOST" which means we owe a replacement cost, but the cost is waved when we return the books. Since we usually have 100+ books checked out, there is no way we could avoid fines and probably would have to quit like you. Maybe other systems will follow the "no fine" policy eventually.
    Amy K

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    1. Amy, I know! I think my Sno-Isle days are the root of my outrage. Once you've tasted the good life, it's hard to live like this:) Also, Stevens County above Spokane handles it the same way Sno-Isle does. I hope it's a work in progress because home-schooling without the library is turning out to be a challenge!

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  4. I was late returning books to the North Idaho library as well Ramah. Even though I returned the books (all intact although LATE) the fines still stuck. The library we went to not only charged a late fee but a fine on top of that for each day they were overdue! It is an outrage! I also no longer have a relationship with the library but now that we have moved maybe I will start looking into starting a relationship again..... A side note- the above library would have a food drive once a year and with a 25 pound food donation they would wave your fees. Maybe it is their way of soothing their conscience. Jess V

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  5. I'm having a hard time reading this any other way than "I'm not responsible enough and therefore they need to pay." I get it - we are all stressed and have a million things to do. But 1) don't assume that the librarian has no life and 2) don't assume that organizations that rely on tax dollars are rolling in money. Libraries in many different places are suffering badly. Regardless of your reasons, you didn't get your books in on time, and there could be people waiting on a list for the books you took out. If you have to create a schedule or alert on your phone to help you, go for it. I often set up alerts on my calendar to keep my appointments in check with my daughter and stepdaughter. You chose to take on the responsibility of taking out books, and with that comes a fine if you can't meet their requirements. Just because you do other good citizen deeds it does not give you the right to be nasty toward the librarian or slide on your duties to them. It's like telling your cable company you couldn't pay your bill that month because you had to fund for your daughter's dance recital, and expecting them to let you slide. Would it be nice if they did? Sure, but you wouldn't have a right to be angry if they didn't.

    We need libraries. They are a great service to the community. Pay your fines and keep them in business, because they are one of the first to get hit when tax budgets get cut.

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    1. SO strange to have 2 very disapproving comments in one weekend for a blog post I wrote a year ago! Are you two friends? First of all I am very sorry I offended you. My intention was to be humorous about a topic that most people I know can relate to--the frustrations of library fines. As I mentioned to Ann below, you may be an exception to that conversation, and I am very to sorry. Of course I paid my fines, that was never up for debate. I agree whole-heartedly that we pay our bills:) And I agree libraries are wonderful, I certainly said as much in my post! However, just as I am free in the end to stop receiving my cable service (to use your example) after I pay my final bill, if I feel that the service is not worth the price tag, am I not also free to stop using the library? My interactions with the staff of my particular library were not pleasant and I left feeling very frustrated. I do know several very wonderful librarians. I think they are great. Again I am sorry that my efforts to be humorous were offensive, my attack on the library was insensitive. As I said, no harm was intended, only humor. In this case it may have been in poor taste.

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  6. Disappointing to see that "Ramah," who by her own admission seeks to topple the stereotypes held about housewives, seeks to attack the librarian by assuming that her life is busier or more complicated than anyone else's. A failure to empathize is the hallmark of many a personality disorder, no? After all, who's to measure the complexities of one life against another's? A self-absorbed someone, I would imagine.

    Homeschooling four children without the service of a public library will likely pose a unique challenge to this mother. Just as four homeschooled children will present their own unique challenges to society at large when their "education" is complete.

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    1. First of all I can't imagine what gave you the idea that I was trying to topple any stereotypes about housewives!! On the contrary, I am as close to the stereotype as it probably gets and I make very little apology for it. My blog is, after all, literally called "Im just a Housewife". My attempt was to be humorous, I am truly sorry If I offended you. I felt patronized and belittled in my exchange with the librarian, and I unfortunately seldom am able to be condescended gracefully. I was actually feeling defensive, not offensive when I spoke. You were not there, she was not nice. I imagine if you had been there we would have talked about it together in outrage on our way back to the car. As you not so generously pointed out, it was below the belt to attack librarians, in general, when I was offended by just one. Again, I am very sorry. I have nothing against librarians as a profession, I actually know a few personally and love them very much:)

      I try to keep my blog light and on topics that most people can relate to. I have been hearing complaints about library fines for as long as I've know what a library is. Most people can relate to library fine frustration. Maybe you are an exception, and I applaud you! Of course I paid my fines, and of course I'm not going to raise my kids without books. I was really just trying to be funny, which obviously did not work for you. I am surprised that dug through my blog to and found this post from a year ago. You seem to have gathered some of the basics of who I am so you must have kept reading even though you do not seem to respond to my style of writing nor my sense of humor!

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